Life: I get knocked down, and I get up again

I thought this would be a quiet year for me.

Last year I spent most of the time in pain, waiting for my endometriosis to be removed, and then in recovery from the surgery. When I got back to work in September, in a brand new, shiny job, I thought things had finally settled down.

When it comes to my health, I think on two levels. My normal level includes the daily pain I get from my waist down, in my muscles and joints, as a side effect from my dysplasia. This is normal, day to day life for me. If it hurts more than usual, I have a hot bath, or I spend more time sitting, but I don't think about it too much.

Then there is the abnormal level. This is anything over and above that pain. Anything in this level can push me over the edge into being unable to do much of anything, because my body is already under stress all the time.

It was the abnormal level that had been dealt with last year, freeing me up to go back to normal life.

When you've been through a big health scare, it changes the way you think about things. Life doesn't phase you quite so much. It was only because I have built up my resilience so much these last few years that I was able to cope so well with that happened next.

There I was, happy. I was so confident in my financial situation and job that I purchased a second hand car. An automatic that would give me more autonomy. I just can't do the long walks like I used to!

And then I got fired. I got fired in a particularly callous, brutal way, along with other unsuspecting staff. No warning. We were just called downstairs, told the company no longer required us, and told to get out and not come back.

It was so surreal, I can still hardly believe it now, more than a month later.

So there I was, unemployed with no notice, with my shiny new car (sort of, it could use a wash actually) and I thought WHY UNIVERSE? WHY DO YOU HATE ME SO MUCH?!

And then I just had to get over it. Yes, it was unfair. Yes, it sucked. But spending days crying and eating chocolate was not going to get me a new job.

So I went to a recruitment agency. I went to interviews. And three weeks later, I had a new job. And you know what, I like it there a lot. I get to work with a great team, and I get to spend my time doing what I enjoy.

 I get knocked down 

Click to enjoy a rousing song 😺

Putting on your best face

Getting through interviews is tough. Looking for jobs is draining to begin with. The internet is awash with millions of them, and a lot of job descriptions are nearly identical, so sifting out the good from the bad is a job in itself.

In the last few weeks I have been to 7 interviews. This is sort of good. When I was younger, with fewer qualifications and less experience, job interviews were very hard to come by. I could apply for ten jobs and hear nothing, and that was not unusual within my peer group. However, interviews are so massively draining!

By the time I was up to interview 5, I really had to fight the urge just to take to my bed in the afternoon and stay there until the next day. On top of that, I came down with a cold. I had to rely on juices and disgusting sachets of lemsip to keep me going.

This morning was interview number 7. I was tired, but I was prepared. I had thought about cancelling and rescheduling for when I felt better, but I decided not to. Sickness is a part of life, and so I turned up, explained I might cough a bit, and carried on, with my bright, shiny face (in that blotchy way that only a cold produces) and red nose.

This afternoon, I found out that I got that job. I probably would have still gotten it if I had cancelled and seen them next week instead, but I might not have. Another candidate might have come along. Life might have thrown in some other curve ball. 

Putting on your best face can be tough, but it's also an opportunity to rise to the challenge. This time, I won.

Your life in two pages or less

About a week and a half ago, I decided with my doctor that I was well enough to go back to work. I still had random pains, and of course my hip dysplasia causes daily pain all on its own, but as long as it's not a job that involves a lot of standing or driving, there is a job out there that I can do. Plenty, I hope.

Because I've been on sickness benefit, I'm entitled to use a free back to work service, where you get to work with advisors. They help you with your CV, with interview prep, and the actual job searching. It was all very new to me, because I had never been out of work before in this way. I was used to going straight from job to job.

I had been feeling a lot of anxiety about going back to work. What did you say to prospective employers? Do you put your time off work clearly on your CV, or do you bring it up in the interview? The consensus seems to be that you don't put in on the CV, but do put it on a cover letter. 

CV's are a minefield all of their own. I hadn't done one for a very long time, and one of the first things that advisor said when looking at it was that the font was old-fashioned. I hope that way back when I wrote it, it was hip, but possibly it was unfashionable even back then. Best not to dwell on that.

Over the next hour or so we rewrote it, and padded it out with some new and trendy buzz words, and then sent it off to three prospective companies.

There is a good side to being unemployed and job-hunting. In the past I had the stress of secretly arranging interviews in lunch breaks, but now I'm free and easy. It's not much, but it's something.

And now...we wait. And apply for a load more jobs, to stave off the tide of rejection emails that will drown my spirits. I must remain positive at all times. At all times. AT ALL F*****G TIMES!

Nailing it.